Thursday, October 23, 2014

Blog 3- Online Dating

Evan Bossio
Blog 3

I find online dating to be extremely intriguing. Software exists that can match us with a possible “mate” based on simple information that we provide. It’s insane! Websites like match.com and eHarmony make this phenomenon possible and effective. In a rapidly advancing technological world, online dating is a necessity. People do not always have time to go out to restaurants or bars to nonchalantly connect with their soul mate by random chance. Online dating provides a gateway to happiness that may not be attained through other mediums.

In class we watched the “When Strangers Click” documentary, which touched on both the positive and negative sides of online dating. It seemed that there are two completely opposite sides of the spectrum. For example, the first woman found her second husband after getting out of a bad marriage, but another man found that he was the victim of his boss’s promiscuous fantasies. It is far too easy to take advantage of people online, but I do not think that people should refrain from online dating forever. Sometimes we may need to rely on luck and remain positive while online. I have two stories that demonstrate the ups and downs of dating online.

The first is a negative representation of what can happen when dating online: getting “catfish-ed”. My best friend from high school had come out as lesbian in 10th grade. It was a very hard and confusing time for her, and she realized there were very few people that could relate to her at the time. She used Tumblr as a resource for release and communication. One day, Abby found a girl’s Tumblr that she really enjoyed and, according to her info and pictures, she was a Canadian, 16 year-old, lesbian girl. Immediately Abby and this girl connected on so many levels. They developed a texting relationship within days and Abby rarely looked away from her phone. It didn’t take very long for my other best friend and I to notice that something wasn’t right. Although this girl lived in Canada and it was already a tad unrealistic for she and Abby to meet up, Tumblr-girl would constantly make excuses for why she couldn’t make it to their planned get-togethers. The tip of the iceberg occurred when Abby’s online girlfriend broke the news to Abby that she could not make it to their New York City getaway weekend trip… the day of! The heartbreak Abby felt in that moment could not compare at all to the devastation she felt when she found out (the next day) that this girl was in fact a 13-year old who looked nothing like that pictures. Abby learned the hard way that you can’t always trust people on the Internet. She now uses social media and dating sites with complete caution, but she does still use them because she can see through other peoples’ experience that happiness can be found from online dating.

For example, my Aunt divorced her husband in 2003 when her kids were just five and three. In about 2007 she was ready to get back out there and explore the dating world, but she found it difficult with two kids, a job, and her “physical” condition (age). My Aunt signed up for all kinds of dating websites. The one that got her the husband she always wanted, however, was match.com. They met online in 2007 and were married in 2009 in an extravagant beach wedding. They are happily living together with her kids in Maryland in a beautiful house. I guess you could say that my Aunt and my step-uncle lucked out because they were both looking for the same things. Apparently, they also both accurately represented themselves on these websites so neither was shocked when they met for the first time.


Today, teenagers are getting more involved in online dating. The most popular form of online dating for our generation is through an app called Tinder. Everyone knows about this app, but not everyone is as cautious with it as they should be. With a simple swipe to the right, you could have welcomed a threatening stranger into your life. However I, along with others, have had many pleasant experiences with Tinder in which I have met decent people and even gotten together with two of them. In lecture we learned, similarly to everything mentioned above, that online dating experiences could have exciting and happy endings, or terribly unfortunate endings.

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